Jennifer Holland
Nov 11, 1982 – Oct 11, 2019
My daughter had such a good heart. Just before she died, she’d been clean for 6 months. I felt like I finally had my sweet girl back (after so many years of drug abuse). I knew she wasn’t strong enough to
be around that drug scene, and certainly voiced my concerns when the police hounded her to help them make a case against her former drug dealer.
She was clean for 6 months. I asked her to come and stay with
me but she had her own life. I believed her when she told me not to worry and that she wouldn’t end up like others. She was looking forward to starting over and living her best life. I wish I would have insisted
she stay with me that night. But, if it wasn’t that night, it could’ve been another. I’ll never know.
I miss my first born every single day. She died exactly one month before her 37th birthday. I miss all the good times we’ll never get to share again and the wonderful memories we won’t get to make. I feel so
cheated. I’m angry and sad. Sometimes I don’t know how to feel. Often I find myself driving down the road and the tears just start flowing. If it wasn’t for my loving six year old, I don’t know how I would’ve gotten through the worst days of my like. She has been my rock. She hugged me whenever I needed it and tells me “its okay; everything will be alright.”
Submitted by Karen Holland, Mother
Donations ensure The Beading Hearts Overdose Loss Support Group can continue to help others affected by substance use and their families